


What Feels Like Me

by Pieter250



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Eleven | Jane Hopper & Maxine "Max" Mayfield Friendship, Eleven | Jane Hopper Needs A Hug, Everyone Needs A Hug, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Mike Wheeler Loves Eleven | Jane Hopper, One Shot, Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:00:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27301573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pieter250/pseuds/Pieter250
Summary: In which Eleven decides that 353 nights of longing for the other are more important than one estrogen-filled day shopping at the mall.
Relationships: Eleven | Jane Hopper & Jim "Chief" Hopper, Eleven | Jane Hopper & Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Eleven | Jane Hopper/Mike Wheeler
Comments: 10
Kudos: 47





	What Feels Like Me

**Author's Note:**

> This summer I started watching Stranger Things and it was hook, line and sinker. I am not sure if I would classify it as binge-watching, but I went through the first two seasons, watching one or two episodes a day, with occasionally a pause of a day or two in between. Then I reached S3E2 and I couldn’t quite wrap my head around the whole ‘I dump your ass’ debacle. I continued watching and even started episode 3, but a few minutes in my disbelief got the better of me and I ended up taking a break from the show for more than a month, thinking about what I would have wanted to happen instead.
> 
> This is the story I ended up writing.

Mike Wheeler was not having a great day. Quite the opposite in fact. This day was a veritable mess if he had ever lived one!

Under normal circumstances he should have gone to visit his girlfriend Jane ‘El’ Hopper this very morning at the cabin in the woods where she lived with her dad. Not today though, as just last night her dad, Jim Hopper, had made it quite clear that his presence was not wanted near his daughter for at least the foreseeable future. Something about them spending too much time in each other’s presence rendering him slowly mad. Honestly they didn’t spend _that_ much time together! Did they?

When El had called this morning to ask why he wasn’t visiting her at the cabin like he always was, Mike had freaked out. He liked to think that he had gotten semi-decent in fibbing his way out of a situation, but all it took was a single, impatient ‘where are you’, spoken by his otherwise soft-spoken girlfriend and he had uttered what must be the worst excuse ever. Honestly! His Nana? What was he thinking?!

So that was how he found himself spending a good chunk of his day, roaming around the mall with Lucas and Will, trying to find a gift to apologise to El. Finding something suitable had been a hassle. Finding something that he could give to his girlfriend that he could actually afford had proven to be impossible. The raven-haired boy shook his head in annoyance at the memory. The bear had been perfect! But how on earth was he supposed to buy it with only a couple of bucks in change in his pocket?!

“So, now that we have wasted enough time, can we finally go back to Mike’s basement and play Dungeons and Dragons?” he heard Will ask from beside him, obvious frustration bleeding through in his question.

Mike pushed the glass swinging doors of the Starcourt Mall open with more energy than was strictly necessary. As if this whole ordeal wasn’t bad enough, his best friend Will had been dragging his feet from the second they had set foot outside his basement to start their quest. What was his problem anyway? Will was supposed to be helping him fix things with Eleven and all he did was nag!

“No Will!” Mike bit out, his patience slowly running out. “We still have to find something for El!”

Mike studiously ignored the grumble coming from the brown-haired boy and walked towards their bikes. “Two hundred dollars”, he moaned, his mind once again flitting back to the outrageous price he would have to cough up to buy the piece of jewellery. “That’s’ ridiculous. Why can’t I just buy that stupid bear? It was literally perfect!”

“Haven’t got that much”, Lucas instantly interjected tiredly, upon hearing the return of the subject Mike had been going on about for the last ten minutes.

Mike was quick to reply, “Okay, what if we split it?” Seriously, he had to make this up to El somehow! At least the guys could work with him here, right?

“Split it with what? Does that even make sense?” Lucas brought up, obviously thinking his best friend was making less sense by the minute.

Before any of them could further their discussion, a familiar, scating voice coming from the direction of the entrance cut in harshly, “Isn’t this a nice surprise.”

Mike’s head snapped up at once, focusing his dark eyes upon the speaker. Max. As soon as he recognized the fuming redhead in front of him, he focussed all his attention at the person standing right beside her. El.

He could have sworn that his heart skipped a beat -or two-, like it always does, when his eyes met Eleven’s brown orbs. Even after all the time they had spent together during the last few months ever since they closed the portal to the Upside Down, he had still not gotten used to seeing her. The fact that she only seemed to get prettier by the day didn’t help in the slightest.

No sooner had he realized who was actually standing in front of him, did the gravity of the situation dawn on him. El was here! Not only had he lied to her, which was bad in and of itself, she was actually _here_. At the fricking _mall_.

How had she gotten here?! If Hopper found out it would surely mean her being grounded until graduation from high school -if they were being lucky. Which meant that they would not be able to see each other and Mike seriously didn’t think he would be able to go through another 353 days without El.

“What are _you_ doing _here_ ”, burst from his mouth in disbelief, not minding his brand new bike that fell from his limp hands straight onto the concrete, nor the fact that Lucas was shifting nervously beside him.

He waved his finger at the girls, who seemed completely unperturbed by the whole fact that El was where she wasn’t supposed to be. Scratch Hopper grounding her for eternity, if one of the bad people from the lab was in the crowded mall and spotted her she might be in actual danger! Doctor Owen had tried to smooth as many wrinkles as he could what with him forging a fake birth certificate, but that didn’t mean by any means that it was safe for El to be here.

A succinct “shopping”, was all the answer he received from El. Mike looked at her a bit more closely. She seemed off, somehow. With her shoulder length, messy brown hair and old plaid shirt, which dwarfed her small frame, she looked exactly the same as always -perfect- but something in the way she stood with her ice-cream was distinctly different.

“This is her new style”, retorted Max smugly, as pleased as ever to butt heads with him. Raising an eyebrow she continued goading him, “What do you think?”

Mike couldn’t quite believe he was hearing this. Was this girl actually serious?! “What’s wrong with you?” he threw back in her face. A rhetorical question obviously as the answer should be straightforward. “You know she’s not allowed to be here”, he tried to reason with the redhead.

Max appeared offended by his choice of words, “What is she, your little pet?”

“Yeah. Am I your pet?” Eleven continued in a tone that was scarily similar to how Max would speak, leaning forward into his personal space in what was a clear challenge.

The dark-haired boy couldn’t believe his ears, “What? No!” Where on earth was this coming from all of a sudden?

“Then why do you treat me like garbage?” his girlfriend parried back, looking affronted, still holding that cone filled with pink ice-cream in her hand.

“What?” was all that he could muster to reply. There was something surreal about the situation. This entire conversation was so far out of his comfort zone that he was reduced to exclamations of utter confusion.

“You said Nana was sick”, she continued calmly. Apparently at least El still knew where this conversation was going.

Shit.

That’s right. In his bewilderment from the strange line of questioning and the shock of seeing El here, Mike had almost forgotten about the complete mess he had made for himself by lying to her just this morning. And the worst part was that he still had nothing to make it up to her! With pain in his heart he didn’t think of anything but doubling down on his deception. “She _is_ ”, he tried, being well aware of the nervous glances Lucas was throwing in his direction. Not a good sign.

Shit.

He couldn’t be doing this… El didn’t look convinced with his words and now he had lied again and therefor he had thrown away any chance to come clean, as he had lied straight to her face -again- and every bloody one had heard! “She is”, he tried again.

“She is sick-”, he said one last time, making wild, frantic gestures with his stupid long, gangly arms. He looked pleadingly to Lucas to help him. To do anything. Lucas was the self-proclaimed ladies’ man of the Party. He had to know something that Mike didn’t!

Lucas, being the amazing friend that he is, fell in almost immediately. “-Yeah sick”, he corroborated his own story, filling it in with some more details. “She’s sick. She’s super sick. That’s why we’re here, actually.”

Mike felt a wave of relief upon hearing Lucas’ words. Okay. That could actually work. He could work with this and maybe this stupid day would finally stop going to tits. “Yeah, we’re shopping. Not for us, but for her, for Nana.” He looked towards Lucas, waving his arm around as he spun the story.

“For Nana”, the other boy agreed vehemently, all the while nervously eyeing his own girlfriend, who was not looking particularly impressed by his participation in the ruse.

The lanky teen could see that even sweet, patient El was getting fed up with their bullshit. Knowing no other way out, he tried to persuade her with some of the truth, “Also, we’re here to get a gift to you.” Mike really hoped she could hear that he was being sincere about this. It was just so hard to get the right words out and after everything he had done wrong they simply had to be perfect.

“Just, we couldn’t find anything that suited you and I only have, like, $3.50, so it’s hard”, Mike said dejectedly. Even to his own ears, it was hard to ignore the pleading tone bleed into his voice. He couldn’t help but feel defeated. This whole day was a mess and he had only made it worse at every turn.

“Super hard. It’s – It’s expensive”, Lucas chimed in from beside him, his voice mirroring his own defeat. Obviously he wasn’t the only one who felt that the jig was up. Mike ignored his best friend’s help in favour of continuing to watch the expression on El’s face.

The curly-haired girl took a tentative step closer to her boyfriend, her face a curious mixture of sadness and anger. “You lie”, she intoned solemnly. Upon hearing her words, Mike’s eyes flitted up from where he had been dejectedly staring at floor to meet her brown orbs.

Lie.

It was something he had never wanted to do to her. Never _her_! Friends don’t lie.

For crying out loud; he had been the one who taught her that. How on earth had he ever convinced himself that lying to her would solve anything?! He was an absolute idiot!

“Why do you lie? Friends don’t lie”, Eleven questioned imploringly. “ _We_ don’t lie”, she continued with a bit more heat. Her brown eyes, which normally held such a warm fondness in them for him, were now sad, begging him to explain.

Mike couldn’t bring himself to look at his girlfriend anymore. His eyes dropped back to the concrete floor, flitting left and right, anywhere but her questioning gaze. He had messed up! He had lied! How could he ever look her in the eye again?

A bus arrived. Its brakes making a high-pitched, squealing noise as it came to a stop near them.

Eleven looked at it for just a moment. When she turned back to him, Mike could see that she had come to a conclusion. With her shoulders squared and an angry scowl on her face, she resolutely stepped towards him, stopping right before his face.

All the dark-haired boy could do was look at her. For all the stories he had told to his friends in his role as Dungeon Master, he didn’t actually know the words that could make this right again. So he just looked at the girl who was his world, hoping that beyond all odds she would help him, like she always did.

“I am going home”, the telekinetic bit out, holding his gaze with startling confidence. “If you want to actually talk you can come by the cabin… otherwise… don’t bother!” Having said her piece she swirled around, her shoulder-length hair almost slapping him in the face, and marched towards the bus.

Mike was only tangentially aware of Max giving him a surprised, but satisfied look, a smirk plastered over her face, followed by her hurrying after El.

For a split of a second he had believed she would actually break up with him and his heart had literally stopped. Blinking back the burning wetness which was gathering in his eyes, swallowing a number of times in an attempt to lubricate his blocked throat, he looked up at the departing bus. The bus which contained his heart.

He had to do something! Anything. Mike couldn’t lose Eleven.

Not again.

**-x-**

Eleven felt lost.

Yes, that was a good way to describe it. Lost and empty.

She was sitting on the bus on the way back to Hawkins, watching the forest and fields move by behind the window. It was the most she had seen of the world since her impromptu trip to Chicago over six months ago. It had been a source of excitement on the way to the mall, but now the scenery just moved by without being registered by her unseeing eyes.

Eleven was vaguely aware of Max chattering on about something beside her, but she couldn’t bring herself to pay attention to her redheaded friend. ‘This was not how my day was supposed to go!’ she thought forlornly. Mike was supposed to come by the cabin this morning. They would laugh, kiss, eat Eggos and it would have been wonderful. Just like it always was. Somehow she had ended up here… on a bus -breaking the rules- with Max after a day shopping at the mall.

That was not to say of course that she hadn’t enjoyed her time with her new, female friend, because she had -a lot as a matter of fact-, but this wasn’t how it was supposed to go.

“El? El! Eleven!” came from the seat beside her. A well-aimed poke right under her ribs startled her from her spiralling chain of thoughts.

“What?” El hissed back at the culprit, Max, who was frowning at her for some reason. That poke had actually hurt.

Max rolled her bright blue eyes in exasperation. ”Have you actually heard anything I have been saying for the last couple of minutes?” she asked. “Never mind”, she interrupted before El could do as much as open her mouth to reply. “You know you should actually lick your ice-cream? Not just hold it and stare out of the window?”

Sarcasm. El had learned that much as her friends seemed to be rather fond of it.

She looked down to her ice-cream and saw that a couple of droplets of molten ice had indeed travelled almost the entirety of the cone. It would be a matter of seconds before it would stain her hand. Happy to have something to focus on besides her unhappy recollections of the day, she set to work to fix the problem, her tongue lapping up the sweet treat.

At least that was what it had been mere minutes ago. Now El winced in her seat as soon as the ice entered her mouth. Too sweet. Her mouth was too dry. She just wanted to throw it away and have some water instead.

“Alright, what is going on with you?” Max asked, brows furrowed in concern. “You have gone all weird ever since we ran into the boys. Don’t tell me you are upset about what you said to Wheeler? He deserved what you said to him. Hell, I still think you should have dumped his sorry ass.”

Eleven shot an annoyed look at her red-headed friend. She appreciated Max looking out for her and wanting to cheer her up when she had been down earlier, but this wasn’t what she wanted.

The other girl lifted an eyebrow in question, expecting some sort of answer. “Come on, El! You can’t disagree with me on this? Mike stood you up this morning, making up some stupid lie.” Max shook her head, clearly becoming more and more incensed on Eleven’s behalf with each word that came out of her mouth. “And when you confronted him at the mall he didn’t even have the balls to confess that he ditched you and went shopping with the guys. You should have dumped him! Honestly! He can’t treat you like that!”

“No”, El muttered quietly in response, her brown eyes staring pointedly at her now ruined ice-cream. The young girl couldn’t bring herself to meet her friend’s blue questioning eyes. There was a lot more that she wanted to say; to tell Max that this had to be one big misunderstanding, that she was horribly mistaken about Mike… somehow.

As usual her voice failed her however. She had been doing so well, learning new words every day, figuring out their meaning and how to use them. Hopper had even given her a book about it! And still when she needed it the most, she couldn’t find the right words to express what she dearly wanted to say.

Being reduced to single word conversations reminded her of the Lab, what it had done to her. With Mike it had never been a problem though, even in the very beginning, when she was just a frightened little girl. Mike had always been able to just… grasp what she meant, even if all she could give him was a single word and an earnest expression, pleading him to understand.

A hand on her arm caught her attention. Max was looking at her in concern. The question so clear on her face that it might as well have been written on it with ink. “El-” she tentatively began, only to be interrupted by the squealing of the bus’s brakes.

The telekinetic girl all but jumped from her seat. This was their stop and it couldn’t have come at a better time. She was done with this conversation. She didn’t want to talk about Mike. Not when Max was saying all those unkind things. “No”, she said again for good measure. Surely that would have gotten the message across? Mike would have gotten it. Eleven was sure of it.

Once she had hurried out of the bus, Eleven started determinedly marching towards the cabin. Home. She threw the remnants of her ice-cream on the side of the road, wiping her sticky hand on her plaid shirt. It was big, old and comfortable. Hopper wouldn’t mind if there were some stains on it.

“El”, came Max’s voice from behind her. She ignored it.

The hand grasping her shoulder moments later, pulling her sideways so that she had to face her inquisitive friend was harder to ignore.

“Come on, El! You can’t just say ‘no’ and then walk away. This is complete and utter bullshit!” Max insisted, standing determinedly in front of her, effectively blocking her path. Taking a deep breath, the redhead forcibly calmed herself and continued in a much softer voice. “What the hell is going on with you?”

Eleven felt her shoulders slump. Great! She had just formed a strange, new friendship with Max, the only other girl in the Party, and now she was already on the verge of losing it. Biting her lip, she began, “I don’t want to dump Mike.”

Max threw her hands up in exasperation, her blue eyes were looking at her with thinly veiled disbelief. “You don’t want to dump Wheeler? That’s what all this is about? Alright I am sorry I gave you some advice in the first place. I thought it would have been good for you if you gave him a taste of his own medicine, showed him that he needs to treat you better than this. I just didn’t realise that you are incapable of living your life without him. Silly me!” Max bit out, bringing her angry face closer and closer as she went on.

“I can live without him!” Eleven threw back with balled fists, her anger giving her the words she needed. “As a matter of fact I have. For months. You just don’t understand!”

“Then make me understand,” Max pleaded, “because obviously there is something I am missing here! Mike is your boyfriend. You are 14. You are supposed to break up all the time! Were you perhaps planning on marrying _him_? The guy you met when you were 12? That is not how normal people work, El!”

“I am NOT normal”, Eleven yelled in response. A part of her was pleased to see the glimmer of guilt that passed her friend’s face. Perhaps she would finally understand. “I was raised in a lab as a science experiment, in case you had forgotten!”

There was silence for a second, neither knowing how to continue after El’s outburst. The two of them turned around and started walking towards the cabin. It was easier having something to concentrate on, like where to place your feet, than having to look the other into the eye.

After a swift glance at her side to confirm that Max was still following beside her, Eleven began, “Mike is important to me, Max. I want to spend my days with him. Not because I _need_ him, but because I _want_ him. Because when he is there everything just becomes _better_ … somehow. I don’t know why Mike lied to me today or why he was at the mall. I do know however that he called me every night after I disappeared for 353 days.”

Noticing Max opening her mouth to respond she hurriedly continued, “Three-five-three, 315 days. That is also how long _I_ waited for Mike, hoping every single night that Hopper would finally let me see him again. I don’t want to dump Mike, because I don’t want to go to bed tonight knowing that for some idiotic reason we are not together. It just isn’t worth it. Not to make a point. Not when we already waited for so long to have a chance.”

Eleven sniffled, running the back of her hand under her nose to make the itchy feeling of impending tears go away. Max’s words from earlier kept running through her head: ‘treat him like trash’. “I don’t want to continue this. I just want Mike to tell me why he was a jerk so that I can tell him he was a mouthbreather and then give him a big hug. That’s all I want”, she said with another sniffle. Damn those traitorous tears.

“Alright”, her friend spoke finally from beside her. El’s head snapped up to look at her. Had she really heard that right?!

“It is your life, your boyfriend… so I guess it is your choice”, Max continued cautiously, trying the words as she spoke them. “I mean it isn’t what I would have done -obviously! I-I guess I am just worried about you. I have been trying to talk to you -actually talk to you- for months now and I have never been able to because it seems like Wheeler is always there. And I felt like he was smothering you, like you couldn’t do anything without him.”

El blinked in astonishment. She had no idea that this was how she had come across to the others! “I enjoy spending time with Mike”, she simply answered, shrugging her shoulders. There was no way on earth she was going to apologise to anyone for _that_!

“I know! - Well, I know that now”, Max exclaimed, before continuing with a deep sigh. “I just wish we could do more things like today. Just girl stuff, without Mike… or the boys.”

Eleven found herself nodding along, her brown curls tumbling down to obstruct her view. “I had fun today, despite everything.” A shy smile tugged at her lips.

“Yeah, me too, though you did let that ice-cream go to a waste, which is totally a cardinal sin!” Max exclaimed from beside her.

Confusion briefly flooded El at the unfamiliar expression. Car-di-nal. She would have to ask Hopper later. When she looked up however she saw Max smiling broadly at her, amusement written all over her pale face. The smile was swiftly mirrored on her own, even wider than before. “We could hang out tomorrow? Just us… the girls?” El asked tentatively.

“Totally! That would be _tubular_ ”, Max agreed enthusiastically, bumping her hip against Eleven’s, careening her off course. This action of course required retribution and by the time the two giggling teens reached Hopper’s cabin they were required to hold on to each other in order to remain standing on their feet.

Eleven was happy. She had made a friend today and Mike would come by later to explain and apologize. She was certain of it! The heroes in the soap operas she religiously watched always did after all and Mike was _her_ hero.

He would come!

**-x-**

“Nooo- look around, he is right there!” El grumbled from her position on the couch.

The telekinetic teen had put on the television in order to have something to do, flipping through the channels with her mind, before finally settling on a romantic soap opera. She had seen the episode in question already though. Grumbling about ‘why it was impossible for love to work out’, she had sunk lower and lower in her seat, until just her brown mop of hair was resting against the back of the couch. She was seconds away from completely slipping on the floor.

Max had left shortly after they had reached the cabin, stating that she was expected home, but that they would definitely see each other tomorrow. El suspected that her red-headed friend was giving her some space, just in case Mike came later.

Apparently talking things over went easier if there wasn’t an audience. When El had heard that she had wondered if that was why Mike had continued lying to her earlier. There had been a _lot_ of people at the mall –more than she was really comfortable with.

The secret knock suddenly resounded through the air.

Eleven perked up at the sound. Finally! She jumped up and all but ran to the door, eager to see Mike despite the different emotions warring within her. From a distance, she threw the door open with a flick of her head and there he stood.

“Mike”, she breathed, coming to a stop before him, relief flooding her body as she took in his familiar lanky frame and floppy hair. He had actually come!

After a second of sheepishly looking at the other, he nervously began, “El… Hi.”

“Hi”, she whispered back.

“You said I could come over”, the dark-haired boy started explaining. “So can I come in?” he asked, gesturing at her small frame blocking the entrance. As a new thought crossed his mind, his face fell. “Or not. I mean, if – if you rather have me stay outside, then that is cool too! Totally cool.”

“No come in”, El replied, standing aside to let him in, a faint blush growing on her cheeks. Had she really been so busy taking him in that she had stood there like a mouthbreather? She closed the door behind him and when she turned around, Mike had put his backpack on the table and was busy rummaging through it.

“What are you doing?” she asked, her eyebrows pulled together in confusion.

“Just a sec”, Mike answered quickly. Before she had the chance to completely move towards him and look over his shoulder, he turned around. In his hands was a beautiful bouquet of flowers.

She let out a breathy gasp in surprise, never having seen anything quite like it. Taking the final step forward, Eleven softly ran her finger over the delicate petals of the flowers. There were so many of them; so many different colours. She wasn’t quite sure where to look first.

“They are for you”, Mike explained, immediately cursing himself for it –as if that wasn’t obvious. “Dad came home earlier and when he found out about what happened he gave me some money to buy you flowers. Said I shouldn’t let a ‘good one’ walk away just like that.”

“They are pretty”, El said, offering Mike a shy smile.

The relief was obvious. “Really? I mean, yeah sure. I-I didn’t really know what to pick for you, so I asked the shop lady to pick something. There are 11 different kinds of flowers though! I counted them… Oh, before I forget, this was my plan B. I made you waffles when Dad came home”, Mike said while rummaging some more in his backpack. “He told me to get the flowers, just in case something went wrong. I don’t think he has much faith in my baking. Anyway I only had $3.50 so instead of buying you something expensive, I decided to do something for you.”

“You made me waffles”, El stated in disbelief, as Mike handed a still warm, heavenly smelling packet of baked goods to her. Her mind had frozen on that particular piece of information. Mike had made her waffles.

Her boyfriend squirmed a bit on the spot. “Well yeah, I guess. I don’t know how well they turned out… Obviously they aren’t Eggos, but they are the sugar waffles from the recipe Nana brought with her when she went on a holiday to Belgium years ago.”

El let out a deep sigh when he mentioned his Nana, all the emotions from the day flooding back into her mind. Biting her lip, she put the waffles next to the flowers and with tears just seconds away from dropping, she interrupted him: ”Mike! You said ‘friends don’t lie’. Max said ‘boyfriends lie, all the time’. I don’t know if I want you to be my boyfriend if that means you will lie to me.”

Her bottom lip was trembling uncontrollably now. Her brown eyes dropped to the floor and with a furious wipe with her hand under her now pink nose, she finished, “W-why did you lie, M-Mike? Why?”

“Oh, El”, she heard Mike softly whisper.

The next thing she was aware of was being gathered in a big hug courtesy of her boyfriend.

Enveloped within Mike’s lanky limbs she finally let go. Big sobs wracked her small frame as she burrowed her head in his chest, trying to disappear in his embrace. Mike let his chin rest on her head, tucking her in. “I am so _so_ sorry, El”, he murmured into her brown curls, rocking her from side to side, reminding El of the dances they had shared at the Snowball.

“You remember when Hopper came into your room, telling us he needed to talk to us, but ended up telling me something was wrong with my grandmother and that my Mum needed me home?” he began softly when the intensity of her sobs had died down and she was now calmly resting her head against him. “Well, you were right; there was nothing wrong with Nana. While Hopper rode me home, he basically told me he didn’t appreciate my attitude nor the fact that you are around me all the time.”

El lifted her head upon hearing this, tilting it so that she could look into Mike’s warm eyes in confusion. “Yeah, he told me he didn’t want me to come by today… If I did he wouldn’t allow me to see you anymore and-”

“I wouldn’t have allowed him”, she suddenly interrupted, her tone leaving no room for doubt.

Mike offered his girlfriend a fond smile. “Thanks, but you can’t just ignore Hopper, El, he _is_ your Dad after all. And I don’t want to be the cause of a fight between the two of you.”

Seeing her about to disagree, the dark-haired boy hurried on, “Anyway, when you called this morning asking where I was, I freaked out and just went along with what Hopper had said.”

“Then why did you go to the mall? Max said you ‘ditched’ me’”, El worriedly asked.

“Well,” Mike said, starting slowly, “I knew you wouldn’t believe the whole story about my Nana and that I had messed up big time with not telling you the truth. So, we went to the mall to try and find something nice for you. Something to say sorry.” Mike awkwardly cleared his throat. He was rambling. Again. “Anyway, I didn’t find anything that felt like you and that I could actually afford and then we walked into you and Max outside the mall and you weren’t supposed to be there, like at all, and… I-I freaked.”

“I think Max wanted me to dump your ass”, El admitted in a whisper, holding his gaze. She felt as much as saw him wince at her words.

“Why didn’t you?” her boyfriend asked just as softly.

The smile Mike received gave all the answers he needed. It was small and shy, but it shone with unbridled affection for him. “I didn’t want to”, she answered simply, while lifting her shoulders in a small shrug. “You are an idiot, Michael Wheeler, but you are _my_ idiot.”

Mike hummed in agreement, slowly bringing his face closer to hers. He had been called far worse and being her idiot was a title he would carry proudly. Finally, after waiting for just a second a hair’s width removed from her tantalizing pink lips, he gave in and softly pressed his mouth against El’s, kissing the lovely smile on her face.

El eagerly returned the gesture, standing on her tips to bring her face closer to his. She deepened the kiss and let her hands snake up his side, eventually wrapping her arms around his neck, making sure he wasn’t going anywhere.

When the time finally came for them to resurface to gather some well-deserved breath of air, neither retreated too far, instead opting to rub their noses together, wide grins plastered on their faces.

All of a sudden El’s brown eyes seemed to double in size as a new idea hit her. “Let’s grab some of those not-Eggos and eat them in front of the TV”, she burst out excitedly, grabbing Mike’s hand and pulling the dazed boy in the direction of the couch.

As soon as they had plopped themselves down on the old sofa, sitting cross-legged facing each other, close enough for their knees to touch, she flicked on the television with a practiced glare at the black screen. A jerk of her head had the packet of sugar waffles flying through the air towards the coffee table, where it crashed down and came to a halt just shy of falling to the ground.

Eleven eagerly took one of the lukewarm waffles, desperate to try her boyfriend’s baking. She ripped the waffle unceremoniously into two, taking a big bite of her piece, while thrusting the other towards Mike.

A moan escaped against her will, as the sugary treat hit her taste buds. “Err, El, these were meant for you… are you sure you don’t want it?” Mike said, bringing her back from waffle heaven. He was eyeing her hand which held the other piece with clear hesitance.

El smiled reassuringly, cheeks bulging as her mouth was still full. She thrust the waffle even closer towards him, until it hit his mouth smearing the caramelized sugar around. Mike finally got the hint and took a bite.

El speculatively eyed his pink lips. They were almost irresistible and so tantalizingly close. She wondered idly how it would feel to kiss the sugar from them. Perhaps she should… for science!

Deciding that there was no real reason not to, Eleven leaned forward, gently kissing Mike on the mouth. She let her tongue roam over his mouth to her heart’s content, appreciating how sweet it was.

It was even better than she had imagined!

When she finally leaned back, she felt a giggle burst forth at the sight of Mike’s dreamy expression. “Of course you get part of my Eggo, Mike”, El spoke, going back to his question. Her tone was softer than it had been at any point during the night. Her eyes spoke volumes, pleading him to understand what she wanted to say. “I will always share my Eggos with you.”

Mike sat still before her, as if struck by lightning in a clear sky. His eyes were almost impossibly wide.

Eleven didn’t wait for a reaction however. Instead she threw her legs over his lap, curling up against him, like a kitten searching for the warmest, cosiest spot to have a nap. For El there was no better spot than where she was now. Taking another bite from her waffle, she refocused on the romantic movie playing on the television.

Mike. A romantic movie. And not-Eggos. El didn’t think that life could get any better!

Then Mike seemed to snap back to reality. He put his arm around her and ran a hand -the one not occupied with his piece of the waffle- through her brown, messy head of hair, idly combing through the curls, occasionally tugging on a particularly frizzy one, just to watch it bounce back.

El curled a bit more into Mike.

She had been wrong earlier… _this_ was heaven!

Minutes passed, peacefully watching the show together. El’s eyes were heavy with sleep and had almost entirely dropped shut, when one of her favourite parts came on. The marriage proposal. No matter how matter how many times she watched such a scene, she would always let out a little sigh of happiness.

Watching the couple on the television hug and kiss after the woman had accepted the man’s proposal, she lifted her eyes to Mike. Tracing the dusting of freckles on his cheekbones with her eyes, she innocently asked a question which had been playing for some time now in the back of her mind.

“Mike?” she started tentatively to gain his attention. When his brown orbs were focused on her and her alone she continued. “Will you ask me to marry you?”

To her confusion her boyfriend tensed up almost instantly. With a strangled sound he vehemently cried out. “What? No!“

Now it was Eleven’s turn to go rigid in Mike’s arms, disappointment, sadness and even more confusion flooding her system. A pained “Why not?” escaped her lips. Mike wasn’t going to ask her? But they were Mike and El… had she made a mistake? Didn’t Mike want to be with her anymore in a couple of years? Did he think she was too damaged to make him a good wife? Too much trouble? Of course she should have known that he wouldn’t want an experiment with a number as a name. What had she been thi-

“El!” Mike interrupted her train of thought, before she could go any further.

The boy had noticed her face dropping and could all but see the dark thoughts on her face as they crossed her mind. I am such a mouth breather, Mike thought, knowing that his initial reaction had hurt her. When she finally looked back at him, though still not quiet meeting his eyes, he continued. “Hey, I didn’t mean it like that! Honestly! I want to be with you… it’s just with all that has been going on and with Hopper and… and… we are 14, El! But you know in a couple of years, after we have finished high school… Yeah, I will ask you to marry me.”

Relief flooded El like a wave and the warm fuzzy feeling from before came back. A happy smile spread over her face and El had to squash the urge to start doodling Mrs El Wheeler on her notes for math. Maybe she would later, when she wasn’t laying in her boyfriend’s arms.

Mike, suddenly feeling self-conscious from opening up so much, had to ask, “When I propose, d-do you think you will say yes?” His heart was thundering in his chest. Would she?

Eleven looked at him solemnly, feeling the gravity of the situation. While nodding her head along, making her brown curls dance around, she sweetly said, “Yes.”

Mike’s relief was obvious to El, but so was the tiny bit of disbelief that lingered despite her words. ”You promise?” he asked with a small voice, so unlike his usual expression of bratty confidence he usually displayed. Hope was shining in his brown eyes. Hope that she felt the same way as he did. Hope that she loves him as well.

“I promise”, El intoned back, meaning it with all her heart.

A quick kiss later, they once more curled into each other, going back to watching the show together. There would be a time for wedding vows and more such nonsense, but for now being with Mike right here and right now was all Eleven needed.

**-x-**

The first thing Jim Hopper noticed when he opened the door to the cabin was the noise coming from his daughter’s room. Her radio was loudly blaring some modern music into the inside of their small home. It was accompanied by El’s cheerful giggling, a sound which would have melted Hopper’s heart if it weren’t for the second thing he noticed.

His daughter’s bedroom door was closed.

Anger flooded his body. He had given Wheeler clear instructions to stay away from his daughter! And yet here they were; the little piece of shit sitting in his daughter’s bedroom with the door closed! How bloody difficult could it be to keep that damn door open a GOD DAMN THREE INCHES?!

Blood pumping through the angrily pulsing vein on the side of his head, he stumbled towards the offending door. “Hey! Let me in”, he yelled, slamming a fist against the wood, before pushing the door open. Now he could get his hands on that little piece of sh-

Mike wasn’t there.

The only one in the small bedroom was Eleven, who was looking at him with a decidedly angry look. “Yes, Hopper just arrived”, she spoke into her Supercom, apparently talking to her absent boyfriend. “Well obviously I am going to… Thanks I will manage... Yeah, talk to you tomorrow... Bye Mike.”

The last few words were followed by a kiss and were spoken with so much love that Hopper could just about see the hearts appear in her eyes. It felt strangely intimate, like he was somehow intruding just watching her curl around the Supercom on the bed.

As soon as El had finished she placed the device on her bedside table. With a flick of her head she switched the blaring radio off, instantly drowning the chamber in oppressing silence. It was almost eerie how different the atmosphere was to just seconds before, when Hopper entered. No more giggles, chatting or music. Instead Hopper was now faced with an unhappy telekinetic teenager, who was leaning back against her bed’s headboard, arms crossed and a very unhappy look on her face.

To make matters worse she was not talking. If Hopper had learned anything over the year and a half he had been looking after his surrogate daughter it was that this kind of silence was never a good sign.

Never.

Too many things had been broken, exploded or cracked after one of these ominous silences.

He let out a deep sigh out of frustration. He didn’t want to be dealing with this! Not tonight. Not after everything that had already occurred.

All of a sudden he spotted an old and quite frankly ugly vase standing on her bedside table, filled with a beautiful bouquet of flowers. They were a bit rumpled perhaps, like someone had been careless while transporting them, but they still made for quite the pretty sight.

“Where did those come from?” he asked, hoping to stave off the impending conversation for just a little while longer. Besides, while the chief had a pretty good idea of the answer, he was still curious.

“Mike”, El replied.

So now they were back to one word replies? Great! Just what he needed.

“And what’s the occasion?” Hopper continued, hoping for more.

At his words, Eleven’s face tightened even more. With a piercing gaze, she said, “To apologize.”

Hopper had to hold himself from rolling his eyes. Two words this time. They were making progress. “Because he didn’t show up this morning?” he proposed.

“No!” El snapped back, clearly not liking the implication. “To apologize for lying to me today! He told me this morning he couldn’t come because his Nana was sick… Sounds familiar!”

Hopper opened his mouth to give a reply, but before he could actually decide on what he was going to say, he was cut off by his now fuming daughter. “You lied to us yesterday! You told him to stay away from me; that you wouldn’t let him see me. You are _stupid_!”

Oh, really! She was going there. Well Hopper wasn’t going to let her berate him in his own home. “You want to talk about being stupid?” he yelled back at her with equal fervour, but significantly more volume than sweet, little El could ever dream of. “You want to talk about how you have spent every single waking second of the last six months with him; even when he wasn’t even here!”

“And what is wrong with that?” El yelled at him. The question was petulant, like a five year old asking why they had to go to bed. There was frustration and confusion clear on her face. Just then a book flew violently from the dresser. A tell-tale sign that El was so angry now that she was losing control over her powers.

Hopper smacked his fist against the door frame out of frustration, before dragging his hand over his weary face. He slowly ran his fingers over his temples in an effort to try and stave off the dull pain of a headache. He could feel his heart beating behind his tired eyes. He had to be better than this, the Chief realised. El was just a child and it was his job to be the adult.

“Can I please sit with you?” he asked her resignedly, pointing towards the spot on her bed, which was now occupied by her legs.

Hopper thought for sure that she would refuse point blank, but after a few tense heartbeats she slowly nodded in consent and pulled her legs in to sit with crossed legs instead. The glare remained fixed on her face though and her arms were still crossed, forming a clear defensive barrier between them. She was willing to listen though, so there was that.

The Chief moved slowly towards his new spot, as if she were a wild animal he could spook with a single wrong movement. His bones ached as he sat down on the mattress. It wasn’t the first time Jim Hopper realised he was getting old. Just watching Eleven grow up was more than proof enough of that.

“I-I can’t say it very well,” he began hesitantly, “but Joyce told me to write it down. I -err- I was going to talk to you and Mike about this the other day, had the whole speech prepared and everything, but perhaps you could just read it.”

Hopper fumbled with the piece of paper for a second, but managed to fish it from the pocket of his police uniform. Handing it over to an increasingly confused looking El, he pleaded with her, “Look kid, I know I messed up, but just read it. I meant what I wrote.”

A hesitant hand snatched up the offered piece of paper. El regarded him with one last long gaze, before she let her eyes drop to the speech. She unfolded it carefully and after smoothing out the wrinkles she began to read.

Hopper watched as her brown eyes flitted back and forth over the sentences, first swiftly, too eager to take it all in, and then slowing down, taking her time to actually comprehend the words she was seeing. A small crease formed between her eyebrows, sign of how invested she was.

It were an anxious few minutes for Hopper while he had to sit and watch his daughter read. Perhaps he should have just told her, instead of doing something as impersonal as handing over a letter. But no. Truth was that despite all El had done for him, melting his pained, cold heart in a way he had never thought was possible when he took her in straight from the woods, he quite simply knew that he wouldn’t be able to express his feelings to her if he had to pronounce them directly to her. At least with the letter acting as some sort of middleman she would know. And she of all people deserved to know.

She meant the world to him!

When Eleven was finished, she continued regarding the paper in her hands for a bit longer. Eyes still and unseeing. Mind lost in her own thoughts.

Then, to Hopper’s great surprise, she dropped the letter and all but bolted towards him, flinging her slim arms around his broad frame, grasping him in a desperate hug. He slowly wrapped his own arms around her and patted her brown curls where she had hidden her face in his chest.

“-am sorry”, he eventually heard her mumble into the fabric of his abnormally fancy shirt, when at last her grip on him had eased somewhat.

Hopper let out a tired breath, feeling the toll this day -hell the last few months- had taken on him. Ruffling her hair one last time, he let out a grumbled “Don’t be.” He could just about feel the smile tug on his daughter’s lips.

He pulled back ever so slightly and with a finger under her chin he lifted El’s head up, forcing her to meet his eyes. Her gaze was curious, though there was still apprehension left over.

“I know that what you and Mike have together is something beautiful”, he began slowly, feeling out the words as they left his lips. “I can’t say that I really understand it -you are just 14-, but it is something special. I _know_. However, no matter how much you want him, he can’t be your life. That isn’t good or… healthy.” His gaze was imploring, begging her to try and understand his point of view.

El nodded her head slowly in agreement. A pensive look crossed her face and with her brows furrowed in concentration, she started talking. “I was _so_ mad at Mike. For not being here with me… and for lying to me.” At this she shot Hopper a baleful glare, though to his great relief it was tempered by the lingering softness in her warm brow eyes.

Hopper cleared his throat with a cough and ran his hand over his moustache, trying to remove the awkwardness that was threatening to creep back up again. Lying to El really hadn’t been a good idea!

“Don’t be too hard on the kid”, he spoke kindly. “I was pretty hard on him last night. Probably harder than I should have been… he’s been a brat though, so really, he deserved a stern talking to!”

The Chief of Police leant back against the wall, shifting ever so slightly to sit on top of the old bed in a more comfortable position. “All people will inevitably end up hurting you, El. That’s a given”, he muttered, eyes unseeing, focussed on nothing in particular. His thoughts wandered to Joyce standing him up big time at the restaurant tonight. He ignored the pang of regret and pushed back the heated flush of anger. Now was not the time.

“The trick is to find those people that are worth suffering for”, he continued, now looking at his daughter where she sat cross-legged against the headboard. He offered her a small, but sincere smile. “I wish you wouldn’t grow up so fast, that you would spend some more time being my little girl. But if you have to go and act all grownup, well… Mike is a good kid.”

El ducked her face downwards in embarrassment, her hands playing distractedly with a loose piece of thread from her blankets. “He is the best”, she admitted shyly, a blush creeping up, warming her cheeks.

After a few moments though, a new thought seemed to cross her mind. El’s eyes briefly flitted up towards him, only to drop immediately.

“What’s wrong, El?” he asked the telekinetic teen, who was now obviously fretting over something, if the way she was biting her bottom lip is anything to go off.

“I hung around with Max today. Mike wasn’t there, so…” she said, now looking straight at him.

“Alright”, he nodded, not seeing what the fuss was about. While his talk to Mike may have been an overreaction -it definitely was-, this was exactly the result he had been hoping for. El spending the day with Max, far away from hormonal teenage boys, especially the ones who just so happened to be her boyfriend, was perfect!

El let out a deep breath, before explaining. “She wanted to take my mind of Mike, so we went to the mall.”

Hopper blinked once.

Twice.

The meaning of those words was slowly but surely seeping into the still functioning parts of his brain. “ _Starcourt_ Mall?” he asked, his voice rough and dangerous. The quiet before the storm.

The question really was redundant. There was only one mall in the entire area around Hawkins, so the answer was obvious. El nodded minutely, without uttering so much as a single word, seemingly reverting back to the mute Eleven she had been not so long ago. Sometimes it was easy to forget how far she had come in such a short span of time, Hopper thought in the back of his mind.

He leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees. Burrowing his head in his hand, he ran his hands once again over his tired face. “It is ironic, I suppose, that the first day that you don’t spend with Mike is the day that you pull off something like this”, he groans, voice muffled by his hands, shaking his head from side to side as if in denial of what he had just heard. “All this time I thought that your little boyfriend was a bad influence on you, but as it turns out, he may just have been the one keeping you out of trouble all along.”

He let out a suffering sigh of frustration, before aiming his blue eyes at the brown-haired girl. “You know perfectly well why you can’t go there, El”, he spoke with his voice raised, though under control. “That is the deal we struck with Dr Owens: we keep you away from prying eyes for at least a year, but we can introduce you to the outside world slowly, but surely. The mall is the last place where you should be! What if someone recognized you? What if you accidentally blew something up?”

He didn’t miss the way she flinched at his last words, nor the distinctly guilty glint that flashed behind her brown eyes. “I know you want to be an ordinary girl, El,” he spoke, “but the very simple truth is that you are not ordinary and you have to be more careful than others.“ He would not always be there to protect her. At the rate that she was growing up, this was a lesson she needed to learn sooner rather than later.

Then she did what was probably about the only thing that could break him away from the disappointment he was feeling. “I think I made a new friend today”, she whispered timidly, voice hoarse and almost impossibly quiet.

Hopper felt the smile tug at his lips. She really was a precious thing. “I am glad for that,” he nodded in acknowledgement, “but that doesn’t change the fact that there will have to be consequences later.”

This made Eleven look up for just a split second. She nodded her head sadly, her face partially hidden behind her curly brown locks. A few moments later, she hesitantly stated, “You know, it is kind of late.”

“Right”, Hopper said, blinking in surprise at the strange turn of events. One moment she was opening up to him and now she was kicking him out of her room… Teenagers! “Right, I mean yeah, I will leave you be. I will be just outside if you need me. Goodnight, kiddo.”

He quickly stood up after that, moving towards the living room. Taking the time to close the door behind him -teenage girls were quite insistent on their privacy he had learned over the last few months-, he then sank into his comfy seat with a grunt and the only movement he made after that was stretching his hand to reach for the remote control.

Not even a minute passed, before he was interrupted from zapping through the channels, attempting to find something vaguely interesting, by El’s bedroom door slowly creaking open. He ignored the dumb comedy he had settled on, to look curiously at his daughter, who stood in the door opening fidgeting on the spot.

“When I said it was late, earlier, I meant that now is a good time to watch a Western together”, she spoke quietly, only peeking up at him when she was finished to take measure of his expression.

Hopper felt the smile creep up his face. “Well then, what are you waiting for? Come over here”, he teased, taking the words for the offer of truce they were meant to be. The Chief felt the weight of the night fall from his shoulders, as soon as he saw his adoptive daughter skip towards her spot on the old couch and plop into it with a decidedly ungraceful jump.

“Do you want some popcorn?” he asked to the girl, who was now curled up, hugging a ratty cushion to her chest.

“Nah, Mike made me some not-Eggos. I am still stuffed”, she answered, voice muffled due to the cushion. With a flick of her head, the television shifted channels, now showing the beginnings of a Western.

Hopper watched his little girl with amusement dancing in his eyes, shaking his head softly at her antics.

“You know I think Mike likes to play board games as well… maybe we could invite him some time to play with us”, she spoke, moving her brown eyes away from the movie for just a second to give him a pleading look.

“I am sure he does, kid”, Hopper snorted at the obvious play. “Maybe we shall invite him to stay over a bit longer some time.”

If Eleven’s smile was anything to go by, then that was the perfect answer. Maybe parenting wasn’t so hard after all! And, well, maybe Joyce had been right about the talking things over as well. Hopper wouldn’t be admitting that anytime soon though! No, Sir!

“I bet Max would love to eat an Eggo-extravaganza as well. Maybe the two of us could have a sleepover and then she can eat one with us!” El suggested suddenly, face brightening at the thought.

“I am sure she would love that”, he answered flatly.

El perked up even more, now really getting into the flow. “Maybe we could go and have a sleepover at Max’s house. Today was fun!” she argued excitedly.

“Love the attitude, kid, but maybe lower your expectations… you are still on rocky ground with that stunt you pulled today”, he shot back, grinning besides himself.

El shrugged her slender shoulders underneath the shirt that almost swallowed her whole. “It was worth a shot wasn’t it?” she asked unabashedly, giving him a cheeky grin, before refocussing her attention on the show.

Atta girl, Hopper thought, shaking his head in mock exasperation. He then followed her lead, leaning back in his seat to watch the movie. Already grinning at the ridiculousness of the story, he let all his worries about her, all the disappointments of the day drift away, instead just focussing on this precious moment he could spend with the precocious teenage kinetic who had stolen his heart.

His daughter.

His little girl.

**Author's Note:**

> One of the best moments of season 3 for me ended up being Max telling El to pick clothes that felt like her. While the advice was given for a very particular purpose, the reason I like it so much is because it applies to anything in life. It doesn’t matter what you do; if you can stand in front of the mirror at night and look yourself straight into the eyes and say that the choices you made were not necessarily the right ones, but choices that you are willing to shoulder the consequences from, then you’ve had a good day.
> 
> Which is why I was so disappointed with El dumping Mike. She threw away her relationship with the boy, who she waited for, for 353 days. Dumping Mike was something Max would do, not the El we know.
> 
> I find it laughable when people say that Max turned El into her own person; helped her think for herself. Yes, Max helped El take an important step in that direction, what with her showing El a different opinion than Hopper’s or Mike’s, but that doesn’t make it El’s opinion. Throughout episode 2 we see El consistently mirror Max’s opinions going as far as literally parroting her words. A big and important step in her learning curve, but it isn’t El we see.
> 
> I did end up liking season 3. No matter how much it pains me, their breakup did teach them some valuable lessons -even if it is just the realization that they never want to break up again. El moving with Mrs Byers, not matter how painful it may be, might just be the best thing happening to El. The time spent with a real mother figure, away from Mike, will allow Eleven to really grow into her own person, to figure out who she is.
> 
> If you enjoyed the story, have an opinion on Mileven or just want to say ‘hi’, then please consider leaving a comment in the review section down below. Feedback truly makes my day!


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